I feel like I'm back in school.

I've always loved projects, but I had a very hard time convincing myself to start this one. My motivation used to be to get "A's" which was a good motivator. In this case the pay off (if it ever comes) will be a book that is well developed, hopefully read and (dare I say) liked.(?) I have been putting this off. Since I've needed to complete it in order to continue writing, I've been putting writing off too. It just seems so formal, and that it's not my job. In many ways it's not. My character is the one doing this research. He's the one the mapping, reading, putting things together (in a slightly neurotic way). However, it has to be really done because I while I don't believe in what he's researching (it's fiction after all). He does. Not to mention I created him. So I'm taking "facts" (which is a term I use lightly) and allowing him to make assumptions about them. However, I have to get it all straight before I can allow him to manipulate them. It's really hard to leave my judgments out of it. However, on the positive side, someday if all this works out and my dreams come true and yadda yadda yadda, all of this work could become prized possessions of my zealous fans. ha!

Wow this post makes me sound crazy one more than one level. Until next time.